How I Got Comfortable With Asking For What I Want | inspireddesignbusiness.com“It doesn’t hurt to ask.”

This has become one of my favorite phrases.

Years ago, after my husband and I moved to Florida, he was in need of a new chair for the desk in his “office” (actually the garage lol). I was in Staples at the time and saw a chair that was on clearance, that would have been perfect for the job.

I have always been shy about asking for what I want or what I need. I’d either hem and haw, and then hesitantly ask the question like I didn’t deserve to ask or that the person would be doing me a great favor,

Or,

I wouldn’t ask at all and instead figure out how to get/do what I needed myself.

It’s a hard way to live, not being able to ask for what you want or need.

Back to Staples…

I must have been feeling cheeky that day – who knows, maybe there was a hurricane in the air. And I saw the chair, which had been marked Clearance, for $125.

I had a thought and decided I would just ask. What’s the worst that could happen?

So I found the store manager, showed him the chair, steeled up my nerve and said, “how much do you reaalllyyy want to get rid of that chair?”

He said, “I would reaalllyyy to get rid of it.”

“Would you take twenty-five dollars for it?”, I said.

He said YES!

I was slightly embarrassed for being so bold (and for asking so little a price) and so excited that I made this unbelievable ask and got a yes! I took the chair home, hubbie was happy, and I built a little bit of my Asking muscle. It was awesome.

In business, we feel like we SHOULD know everything, and that not knowing meant we either did something wrong or didn’t know enough or we didn’t study enough or research enough or that we weren’t good enough – it becomes a slippery slope of negativity that lands us in the gutter, struggling to get up.

But guess what?

It’s totally ok to ask for what you want or need. Because, what’s the worst that can happen?

  • What do you want or need to know?
  • What do you want or need physically or mentally?
  • Would you like someone to proofread something for you?
  • Would you love to purchase something, but the price is a teeny bit over your budget?
  • Is there terminology in someone’s business/industry (for example, your website developer) that you didn’t understand, but didn’t want to appear stupid by asking? 

The possible questions can go on and on.

Here’s the thing…

A) It’s totally ok to ask for what you want or need.

And

B) While it’s great to get a positive response, it’s also ok to get a “negative” response.

I put the word “negative” in quotes because if the response isn’t quite what you were expecting or hoping for, it doesn’t mean anything bad, and it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have asked. Let’s say that again,

If the response isn’t quite what you were expecting or hoping for, it doesn’t mean anything bad, and it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have asked.

Because there are lots of reasons why our Asks can’t be granted and that’s ok too.

Am I perfect at asking for what I need or want? Absolutely not. But I’m much better with it than I used to be.

When’s the last time you needed or wanted to ask for something and you resisted?

When’s the last time you needed or wanted to ask for something and you did it (regardless of the outcome)?!

What struggle are you experiencing right now that you could use help with?

Ponder these questions and then leave me a message in the Comments around those questions. I can’t wait to read them!

How I Got Comfortable With Asking for What I Wanted